Kids Make Me LOL » Toddlers

Pretty mommy

admin — Wed, 20 Jan 2010 21:23:44 +0000

A few days ago I was upstairs putting away some of my daughter’s toys. When I came back downstairs my 2 year old daughter’s face was completely covered in black mascara. I was about to put her in time-out for getting in to my make up when she looked at me so proudly and said, “Pretty mommy” pointing at her face. She then pointed at the dog and said, “Pretty mommy”. When I looked at the dog, her face was also covered in mascara. My poor dog was just laying there staring at me with a “save me from this child” look on her face.

Submitted by: Elizabeth

Makes sense to me

admin — Thu, 07 Jan 2010 18:09:19 +0000

My Aunt was giving her two 3 year old sons a bath one night and asking them questions about things they were learning in school. She asks them, “What kind of bird does not fly?” One of them says “A dead one!” The answer she was looking for was a penguin.

Submitted by: Renee

He wuv’s everything

admin — Tue, 22 Dec 2009 16:17:21 +0000

When my two year old wakes up every morning he says, “Good mowning kwistmas tree.” Sunday morning he went up and hugged it and said “I wuv you.” He likes to hug things. Sometimes he hugs the door when we get home and says, “I wuv you house.”

Submitted by: Lisa

It’s beginning to look a lot like Christmas

admin — Sun, 20 Dec 2009 16:47:47 +0000

A couple nights ago my husband and I put up the decorations while our kids were sleeping. When my 2 year old woke up she walked around wide-eyed and said, “Mommy, it looks like Christmas… EVERYWHERE!”

Submitted by: Tina

Maybe too much information

admin — Tue, 15 Dec 2009 17:14:50 +0000

After picking up my 3 year old from my mother’s house one day I asked…

Me: “Did you use the toilet at Grandma’s house?”

Son: “Yes”

Me: “Number 1 or number 2?”

Son: “I think number 5, I went a lot.”

Submitted by: Stephen

What? I can’t hear you

admin — Mon, 14 Dec 2009 16:28:35 +0000

We got my son a Mother Goose talking cassette player for Christmas (back in the day). It was pretty cool, it would move and the cassettes would play from inside Mother Goose like she was reading the story. Anyway, a couple days after Christmas…

Son: “Mom, I want joooze.”

Me: “Joooze? Do you want to put on your shoes?”

Son: “No, joooze.”

Me: (clearly understanding) “Ohhh, you want me to get Mother Goose.”

Son: “NO! Mom I want JOOOZE! You know, in the jigerater.”

Submitted by: Esther

Well, it all tastes like chicken

admin — Sun, 13 Dec 2009 17:51:10 +0000

My son, Chad, threw a fit one night when we sat down for dinner.

Chad: “We always have chicken for dinner!”

Me: “Chad, these are pork chops.”

Chad: “Right! We always have chicken. Pork chop chicken, steak chicken, ham chicken, chicken chicken, it’s always chicken!”

Apparently we had meat for dinner pretty often.

Submitted by: Esther

Hurdles and popsicles

admin — Sat, 12 Dec 2009 17:46:16 +0000

My 4 year old son loves to sing, “I can see clearly now the rain is gone. I can see all the popsicles in my way.” I giggle every time.

Submitted by: Ruthanne

Reading the fine print

admin — Fri, 11 Dec 2009 21:31:10 +0000

I asked my 3 year old girl how her father knew the genders of the baby kittens. She replied, “Daddy just picked them up and looked underneath. I think it’s printed on the bottom.”

Submitted by: Amy

Ham is my favorite too

admin — Fri, 11 Dec 2009 21:03:38 +0000

All of my family was gathered together for Thanksgiving dinner. My cousin’s wife is a vegetarian but my cousin himself is not. So their 3 year old son Colin is sort of in limbo.

Colin: “Can I have more ham?”

Dad: “Sure.”

Mom: “Would you like some more green beans?”

Colin: “No, ham.”

Mom: “How about some salad?”

Colin: “No!”

Mom: “Pumpkin pie?”

Colin: (Slowly and clearly) “No, please can I have JUST ham?”

Dad: “That’s my boy.”

Submitted by: Chad (admin)