A few days ago I was upstairs putting away some of my daughter’s toys.  When I came back downstairs my 2 year old daughter’s face was completely covered in black mascara.  I was about to put her in time-out for getting in to my make up when she looked at me so proudly and said, “Pretty mommy” pointing at her face.  She then pointed at the dog and said, “Pretty mommy”.  When I looked at the dog, her face was also covered in mascara.  My poor dog was just laying there staring at me with a “save me from this child” look on her face.

Submitted by: Elizabeth

My family and I spent Christmas with my niece and her kids.  When we arrived I noticed that my six year old nephew’s nose was all scratched.  I asked him what happened and he responded with, “Grandma’s dog bit my favorite nose.”  A couple days later his brother hit him in the eye with a snowball, and I heard him tell his mom, “Billy hurt my favorite eye.”

Submitted by: Daphne

My Aunt was giving her two 3 year old sons a bath one night and asking them questions about things they were learning in school.  She asks them, “What kind of bird does not fly?”  One of them says “A dead one!”  The answer she was looking for was a penguin.

Submitted by: Renee

I asked my 3 year old girl how her father knew the genders of the baby kittens.  She replied, “Daddy just picked them up and looked underneath.  I think it’s printed on the bottom.”

Submitted by: Amy